Weakness

Why I have to be so weak?
Why I cannot be stronger?
I got the weapons, but I guess I am not using them like I am supposed to do.
And now I am on the bottom (once again)
I will start over this freaking situation, that only make it worst.

I care about out love, even I act like if do not... I am sorry, I never wanted to hurt You, I never wanted to hurt us.
But now I am here, sitting, thinking, and felling like if I do not care about us.
But I know (very deep inside of me) that I really care about our relationship.
I am really sorry... there is no excuse for what i did.

What I have done? this is killing us!
Please do not let me here alone... i do not want to die... please talk to me... i am sorry.